Lynne Franklin is a persuasion expert, leadership communication consultant, coach, author, and TEDx speaker. As a neuroscience nerd, she studies how the brain works and how to use the findings to better connect with anyone and lead without manipulation. Since the inception of her communications practice in 1993, Lynne has worked with organizations that want to use persuasive communication skills to increase their performance, productivity, and profits. 

 

 

Here’s a glimpse of what you’ll learn: 

• Lynne Franklin talks about her professional background
• Body language tips for making good first impressions and relationships 
• How do you create positive energy in your communication with people? 
• Lynne shares communication tips for financial advisors to develop good relationships with clients 
• How to maintain long-term client relationships 
• What’s the best way of coming out of a relationship with a client? 
• Lynne’s personal development and team-building advice for financial advisors 

In this episode…

Communication is the backbone of any successful business. So how can you better serve your clients through communication as an advisor? 

According to Lynne Franklin, mastering the art of persuasive communication is fundamental in motivating your team and inspiring your customers to take action. It entails understanding body language, listening, and comprehending your audience and their needs to tailor your message to resonate with their interests and concerns, establishing trust and credibility. She shares her journey helping advisors connect and build good relationships with clients through communication to take their businesses to the next level. 

On this episode of Advisor Today, Suzanne Carawan sits down with Lynne Franklin, a leadership communication consultant, to discuss how to thrive through persuasive communication as an advisor. Lynne talks about body language tips for making good first impressions, communication tips for financial advisors to develop good relationships with clients, maintaining long-term client relationships, and personal development and team-building advice for financial advisors.

Resources mentioned in this episode:

• Chris Gandy on LinkedIn  
• Suzanne Carawan on LinkedIn 
• NAIFA  
• Lynne Franklin on LinkedIn  
• NAIFA's Apex East 

Sponsor for this episode...

This episode is brought to you by the National Association of Insurance and Financial Advisors, or NAIFA, the #1 association for producers in financial services.

At NAIFA, we enhance professional skills, promote ethical conduct, and advocate for legislative and regulatory environments.

By joining NAIFA, you gain access to a partnership that elevates your performance while providing greater purpose to your professional work. NAIFA members are happier, make more money, and stay in the business longer.

Get in touch with NAIFA and learn more about how to join NAIFA by visiting NAIFA.org.

Episode TranscripT

Intro 0:02 

Welcome to NAIFA's Advisor Today podcast series, where we focus on how financial advisors work, live, and give to their local communities and our greater financial services industry. Now, let's get started with the show.

Suzanne Carawan 0:20 

Hello, everybody. Welcome to today's Advisor Today podcast. I'm your co-host, Suzanne Carawan. My co-host, Chris Gandy is out today doing some preventative stuff, so we're gonna miss him. But we have an awesome, awesome, awesome guest today named Lynne Franklin. Before we get to that, I just want to do a plug, because this whole episode is brought to you by Apex. Apex is NAIFA's brand for our professional development summit. And we're having a regional for about two weeks, October 24. Lynne Franklin is one of the keynotes. So we're actually bringing this to you ahead of time. So you can kind of get an insight there, if you're not going to be with us at our new national headquarters in Washington, DC. You can also look for maybe future things where Lynne will be, but at least you can get some of the unbelievable goodness that Lynne's gonna present to us today. So Lynne, thank you for being here. We're excited to have you on the show.

Lynne Franklin 1:10 

It's great to be here and looking forward to giving people things they can use right away to make their lives better.

Suzanne Carawan 1:17 

So Lynne, if anybody did any Googling on Lynne, she kind of starts out with, you can help us become a mind reader. So first and foremost, like, why don't you tell us what it is that you do and how you got here.

Lynne Franklin 1:30 

Basically what I do is I fast-track leaders to be seen, heard and promoted. And how I do that is by helping them do a better job of connecting with people. So it's connecting with clients, it's connecting with vendors, it's connecting with team members, it's all of those relationships, building those relationships, that builds your success. And how that ends up looking depends upon what people need. The three areas I play in the most are one-on-one communication coaching usually for leaders. Second, bring me in and help me work with your team. So they do a better job of connecting. And three is the stuff that we get to do at Apex East, where we get together as a group of people. And we solve a problem that's really bothering people that day. And once again, everybody walks off with at least one good thing they can do to improve their lives and improve their business.

Suzanne Carawan 2:24 

Well, as you know, our members are all about communication. They practice, we just had John Wheeler on last week, he was talking about choosing your words, unpacking your words, making sure that you practice your language, but you also are practicing the body language part. And I think that's so important. So let's talk about that a little bit. Because all of our members and prospective members, by the way, if you're out there, and you're not a member, you need to become a member, this is the type of good stuff you get in part of our community. So in terms of that, let's start with some of the basics of body language. And I think most people know because the typical scenario that our member has is that they need new clients, right? And it's time to prospect and it's all about meeting new people. So can you take us just right from that, let's just get to the good stuff. Let's get to some practical things about how to however you want to say it make the best impression so you can open that conversation. Because our people need to have some pretty serious conversations as quickly as possible building trust and rapport is tantamount right tantamount to their success. So I'm just going to throw that little softball over to you and you take it from there.

Lynne Franklin 3:30 

Okay, there are a couple of different things that we need to pay attention to, particularly when you're talking about making good first impressions. And the first one is, as a neuroscience nerd, I study how the brain works. And I study the boring research and then I try to figure out what it actually means in the real world. And so one bit of boring but practical information, is that the best indicator about whether or not you will have a relationship with a new person, whether it's an interview, or whether it's for a possible relationship, or even if it's you're hiring other people, then you're gonna laugh. It's literally that handshake. So, honest to goodness, practice your freakin huge shake. So if you give people a good handshake that's firm, but that bone-crushing, and certainly not limp wristed research shows that's the best indicator about whether or not people will feel comfortable enough with you to start trusting you. And obviously, when we're talking about handshake, a lot of the stuff that you do is now virtual. And so some of that becomes all right, if you're doing a meeting on zoom, then what you do is you clear the clutter out of your background. You literally do what you can see on my screen here I'm filling up 80% of the screen with a little bit up at the top of over my head. And one of the other things that you need to do and pay attention to more often whether in person or whether on screen It is actually, really, we get so intense about the things that we want to accomplish that a lot of times we don't smile. And there's a pejorative term for this. It's called resting bitchface. And yeah, and it's not just for women, it happens to men as well. And it's your thinking, so you're going, yeah, and that to other people, they experienced that as frowning. So pay attention to what you're doing with your resting face, once again, in person on screen. And I recommend the really not just the Mona Lisa smile, the balloon, like you're truly interested. And if you're on screen, it also means you look at the camera, rather than looking at the other person. And I do this a lot when I'm doing on-screen meetings. And that is, I let people know, when you're speaking, I'm gonna be looking at your image on the screen. So it will look like I'm not paying attention to you. But I really emphasize I want to get the whole picture of you, when I'm speaking, I'll be looking at the camera, because I want you to know that I'm talking directly to you. So if you look at me, while you're speaking, it's gonna look like I'm not looking at you. But I really am. And when people know that's what you're doing with your eye contact, it makes people feel a lot more comfortable. As you were talking before about the reading people's body language to read their mind stuff. This plays into that. Because what happens is that people's brains process information in three ways, visually, auditorily, or kinesthetically. And when you understand how their brains work, then you do a better job of connecting with them. So the 10,000-foot view. And if you want more on this, I actually have a TEDx talk out there on how to be a mind reader. 11 minutes, time well spent, it gets into more detail than we can get into here. But you pay attention to how people look, their body language, and then you can figure out how their brains work. So 75% of the people in the world are visual thinkers, they think in pictures and images. And you can tell that by they're usually well dressed, they usually sit up straight, they usually give you lots of eye contact, and they have big lips, who knows why, but they just, most of the time they do. And so what ends up happening is that when you check out body language, and you're seeing that sort of thing, either in person or on the screen, then you know, they're one of the 75% of people who are visual thinkers. And what you do that is basically two things. Number one, you give them lots of eye contact, because visual thinkers, I call it lookers, if you're not giving them eye contact, they believe you're not paying attention to them. And that makes them a lot. The second thing you do with visual people is you use visual words, I see what you mean, or picture your future when you don't have this problem. So what's the kind of language that they're using in their brace, you're speaking to them in their language. So lookers. 75% of people in the world, they think in pictures and images. Second largest group, listeners, they process information auditorily. So they talk to themselves. And what ends up happening is that listeners usually not as well dressed as lookers, because appearance isn't important to them. And most of the time, they don't give you lots of eye contact. What ends up happening is that listeners have a tendency to look down into the left, because that's where you look when you're remembering something you have heard. What happens though, is when people are doing that their ears are pointed at you, so listeners use their ears the way lookers use their eyes. And listeners also have a tendency to talk to themselves, so they could mumble or they could be moving their lips when they're thinking because that's how they process information. And if you want to connect with these people, you do two things. Number one, you do not give them unremitting eye contact because it frightens them and make them feel uncomfortable. Which means that when you're speaking with them, you look at them, and then you look away and when they're speaking with you, you look at them, and then you look away.

Suzanne Carawan 9:19 

Actually give them a break. Like actually give them breaks, they can kind of...

Lynne Franklin 9:26 

Generally they don't want to be center stage. So too much eye contact just makes them feel uncomfortable. And not surprising, the second thing you do for them is that you use auditory words. That sounds good to me. I want to hear what you have to say about that. Because that's how their brains are working. So listeners 20% of the people in the world. The final 5% of people are called touchers. So these are people who process information kinesthetically. And the reason they're called touches is that whether or not these people you've ever met before their lives they're ready to come at you with a giant bear hug. And that's the biggest tell, they also have a tendency to lean in, or shoulder or speak in deep voices, or have long lips. So these are ways you can identify touchers. And the way you connect with these people is if you feel comfortable with them, then you can let them touch you on your arm or your shoulders or certainly shake hands with them, once again, if they're coming at you, and you don't feel comfortable having somebody hug you that you've never seen before, what they're looking for is contact. So stick your hand out, give them a point of contact, that's what they're interested in. They're not trying to invade your space, they're trying to decrease the space between you and them, because that's how they build rapport. And the second thing you do is you use the same kind of language they use in their brains, which is feelings and travelers will want to get in touch with you, or how does that solution feel. Because once again, that's the language they're using in their own advice. So one of the things you could do is check out that TEDx talk that will give you an exercise so you can figure out number one who you are, are you a looker listener or a toucher and second, then you can start paying attention to the people around you. Because we all have a tendency to treat everybody as though they're the same as we are and that can be in the state. It's true, lookers 75% of the people in the world are lookers. So if you're a looker, you're in pretty good stead. But every time those listeners aren't paying attention to you, looking at you, you're getting frustrated, doesn't mean they aren't paying attention to you, though. And we have in our brains, one final thought, something called mirror neurons mirror as in mirror on the wall. And this is a subconscious part of our brain that is encouraging us to give the same body language that we are seeing from other people. So guess what your subconscious mind is helping you do a better job of connecting with people by mirroring their body language. And it's funny because I asked people all right, you've hung around with me for a while. What do you think I am Looker listener toucher. And most people will say, looker, I'm actually a listener. But if I spent this entire interview looking down to the left and pointing my ear at the camera, a lot of people would feel alienated. I can't change how my brain works. But I can adjust my body language to be with the people I'm where I am.

Suzanne Carawan 12:35 

So taking all that into account, I mean, I think the key thing there is one you have to be aware of who you are. And then you have to get over yourself and be able to then mirror that person. And I get that on the body language. But actually talk to me about something else that I think is really interesting, that we don't talk about enough. And that is energy, right? Kind of like the your cadence and your voice and et cetera. Because our members do they have to address some very difficult conversations and topics. But having said that, being able to do it in the right way, I think is also quite a skill. So what about the energy piece there, that's actually of kind of going back and forth between humans when you are connecting?

Lynne Franklin 13:18 

And, frankly, research once again, neuroscience nerd, research shows that if you listen, well, people will rate you as the most fascinating person in the room. So part of it becomes being a good listener. And there are two types of listening you could do. The first is the most common. And it's called listening to respond, where you listen to for the data that the person is sharing, and then you're thinking about how you're going to respond to that data, what you're going to say when they've been speaking, useful. But an even better level, particularly for us as people who are in insurance and financial advisors. There's something called listening for understanding and empathy. Where we're not just listening for content, we're actually paying attention to a person's body language. Does it look like they're pulling back? Or does it look like they're twitchy and they're nervous about what it is that we're talking about? And what we do then is we name what it is that we see. And we say things like, when I talk with other people about the subject, being abdomen, a lot of times they get 90 nervous about it, how are you feeling about this? And we ask them to name their feelings, or if they can't name their feelings, because I've got all kinds of German relatives who cannot name their feelings for you. What I do for them is I named that feeling for them. It's like yeah, are you feeling nervous? Are you feeling anxious? Or if I were in your situation, I would feel and then let them respond. That's part of showing understanding and empathy. Because if you're building a relationship, it's not just your job to push out information that they need to know. It's also showing them that they are seen and heard, because most of us wander around feeling chronically unseen and unheard. And when somebody could ease attention to us, it feels so wonderful. And we feel so important to that person in that moment. And we're willing to share information. So it's not just energy. Well, of course, it's energy in that, yes, a lot of times, you're leading men a little bit. So once again, decrease the distance between you and the other person to show that you're engaged, and you're hanging on their words. But it's also the passion that you have for what you do. And that's usually where we put the energy. So the best thing we can do is ask them the insightful questions, which all of you know how to do, you know how to gather information. And then talk about the feelings that people have about sharing this information. But also, aim, what's going on with them, is people who have been in a situation, oftentimes, these things occur for them. And it's showing them that we're interested, and then finally, being able to paraphrase what they're saying. And so if somebody says, like feeling really anxious about things, and so you say to them, I get it, you're feeling anxious about this, and people say to me, you got to say that all I did was just say the same thing they said, they're gonna think I'm an idiot. And actually know, what shows up in the brain stuff is that when you use the words that someone has just used to tell you something, they can literally feel seen and heard, and they feel more connected with you. Because if someone were to say to me, I feel anxious, and I say, I'll see you're feeling nervous about this. Nervous is not anxious, it's a different thing. And a lot of times, we can be judgmental when we change somebody else's language. So for us paraphrasing really becomes lay back the words that they're giving you, it makes them feel seen and heard. And that increases their energy and their connection with you, the best thing you can do energy-wise, is to be passionate about what you do. And that is to solve people's problems and help them feel safe, no matter what comes down the pipe. And when you're paying attention to what they're saying, and paraphrasing it, they feel connected with you. And that gets a relationship off to a good start. And it keeps a good relationship going.

Suzanne Carawan 17:36 

So I think you said something that's that I really want to touch on, which is people walk around feeling chronically, unseen, unheard. That is so powerful for a financial adviser, I think when you pair with the fact that there's so many Americans out there who have not had the financial education, and are walking around a lot of times, most of the clients are not coming to your doorstep saying, hey, I'm independently wealthy, and I just can't wait to talk to you about what I want to do with my money, right. So there's a whole level of oftentimes we're finding right with shame and fear in going into this. So knowing that also they're walking around and they're looking searching for a place to be safe, I think is what you're saying to be heard and seen. Actually, what a positive position that puts you in as an advisor, if you know that, if you're coming from that standpoint, is what I think you're saying, right? And so then how you can take that. So what would you say to an advisor when they have that they're in the beginning of creating this relationship, they're dealing with somebody and they have to be able to get to these pieces. So I like that you're saying, basically reiterate what they're saying using that same language. It's another key point there. But what can advisors do to bring down that stress level? What are some kind of tips there that they can do to kind of break through that so they can get the people into a positive forward-thinking mode and not get shut down by that fear?

Lynne Franklin 19:03 

And that's a great question because I think part of it becomes being all things a method actor. What are yourself in the other person's situation. And then you name the kingdom Suzanne, is people are afraid. People are afraid they have made financial mistakes, and you will find them out and think they're idiots. That's one of their biggest fears. Second, they do they miss they're afraid they missed opportunities. And they're afraid that they're in a hole that they can't get out of. So fear is the biggest thing you will encounter when you're working with someone new. And so being able to name those fears and a lot of times, telling a story of somebody else who's been in a similar situation because magical things happen when we tell stories, the 10,000-foot view is that if I'm telling you a story about something that's happened to me, or some client that I've worked with, my brain actually reacts as though that's happening to me in the moment. So if I'm talking about a client who's very fearful, it's almost as though my brain thinks I'm in that situation. That's interesting. But what's cool is that the client, then at the same time, also feels like they're in there, what's going on is that they might, the fear center of the client is lighting up as though they are the clients in the story. And that connects us on a molecular level, you can get me going on storytelling all day long. But the idea is, people are afraid, number one, that they made a mistake, and they've done bad things. So you'll find out number two, they're afraid that you're going to try to sell them something they don't need, or want two biggest fears. How do we address this stuff? Well, we can say, I'm not going to try to sell you anything, they're not going to believe you. But if you can tell them a story about the first time you met a client who was in a similar situation. And guess what, we had this conversation, and here was the solution that we ended up coming up with. And here's how they resolve that issue. And here's how their life was made better by what we're doing together. So positioning yourself as a person who solves a problem that they have. And if they don't have this problem, then they've already solved it elsewhere, it's just great that you were there to figure out whether or not the two of you really ought to do better. And so if you're having an exploratory conversation with somebody to be able to say upfront, hey, this is a sales-free zone, I'm not going to sell you anything. today. I'm here just to listen, to ask you some good questions, and to better understand what it is that you need. So I'm going to listen more than I'm going to talk, I want to have a good understanding. And then by the end of the conversation, we'll figure out whether or not there's something for us to have our next conversation about. And then I can come back to you with some things that I think you ought to consider. But today, I'm just here to listen. We as people who want to build relationships, want to dive right in and know we can help people and want to give them the solutions right away. Most people aren't ready for it immediately. We need to build trust with them. And we build trust by listening, asking good questions, and letting them know their big fear of being judged. And being sold to that's not going to know at least today.

Suzanne Carawan 22:48 

That makes sense. It makes perfect sense. Yeah. And then I guess the other piece, I'd say is, with the storytelling with all of that, where would you fit in and neurologically with all this stuff, we're talking about? Where does visualization fit in? Right? Where does visualization because I do think we have a lot of people that they want to work with goal setting, also with their clients. And so what happens with the brain when you're starting to visualization, because it's the same thing, there's the imagine this could happen to you in a very negative, but there's of course, the other positive of let's be aspirational about it, and what that looks like, so thoughts there.

Lynne Franklin 23:26 

And you've hit the nail on the head, because one of the most powerful words you can use in any conversation is imagine because you put people in a place. So if it's a negative place, because they're already in fear, if you do and a lot of times it becomes if you do nothing today, what will this look like for you in a year in two years, and then have them telling you, or if you don't have the worry that when you retire, you're going to run out of money. Imagine how that would look or talk to me about that. Because once again, we have seen this for a lot of other people, we know what's coming. And we have a tendency to tell people what's coming, instead of inviting them to do the visualization, and then tell us what they see, then it's much more powerful. Because when I take a look at oh, if I do nothing today, in five years, my financial situation will be dire, particularly if I know that these things are coming along. Or if I do something today, and I protected from that, this is how my life is gonna look. So we as people who want to build connections with boats and want to get them frankly, they'll sell themselves on this if they're the ones who come up with a solution because we've all been there. We've had people tell us do this, and then a lot of times we resist and so will our clients but if we say, imagine this, imagine how your life will look, if you do this. And tell me about that, then what ends up happening is they get so involved in this world that they're visualizing and that they create that's safe and is reaching their goals. You don't have to tell them what to do. That's what they'll want.

Suzanne Carawan 25:23 

And I would think, ostensibly too that that would be the basis for a much longer-term relationship, because they want to keep coming back to the good stuff. Right. So if you have somebody who's also on your side, and that's celebrating you, I would think that that would be a big positive. So thoughts there on that long-term relationship, right, of keeping relationships over? I mean, we're talking, for a life insurance agent, I mean, hopefully, you're establishing this for multi generations. And I think that's a different piece. Now, people, it's not even just the retirement, it's the outliving them, it's the problem now is living too long, right? And getting into all sorts of stuff. So then you have to have connections with the children. So what would you say for kind of tips or tricks there with being able to develop that long-term rapport to have a long-term relationship of these constant conversations?

Lynne Franklin 26:19 

And it's funny, because it actually starts at the beginning, because you set the expectations there. And the best story I've heard from a financial planner was he was speaking with a husband and a wife about their situation. And they were going to schedule another meeting. And they said, oh, it's going to have to be next month, because we're going to the Bahamas in two weeks. So what does this, let's call him Rob. What does Rob do? Rob goes online and investigates the best travel books for the Bahamas, buys a copy, sends it to the apple and says, have a wonderful trip? Well, it turns out that they were going with a bunch of their friends, this book arrives before they leave. And they feel seen and heard, right? Rob heard that they were going on vacation, and he sent them something so that they can have a better vacation. So they're talking Rob up to their friends, while they're on the staycation. So not only does Rob get to work with them, he gets to work with some of the other people who were there on that vacation, who were impressed that he went out of his way to do something. So part of maintaining, building and maintaining a relationship is the reach out with something of value on a regular basis. And you evaluate how often clients want to be in touch with you. So it could be once a quarter, you send somebody an article, or a video that you shot about something that you know is coming up for them. So it gives you the opportunity to speak to them directly through video at a time that's convenient for them. Or if they like to receive information by tests, because this is one of the things you'll figure out early on in the relationship. A lot of people like to get information, how do they want to hear from you, we have a tendency to default to phone calls or emails, if they want to x, let's use that. And why guess when people will be happy to tell you how it is that they like to get information. So the idea is relationships take time and thought meaning that, one year comes up and how many of us have sent out the note of hey, it's been a year since me spoken, it's time to talk again. And if you are sending people something, once a quarter, they've already heard from you a couple of times when you're not asking them to do anything, you're sending them something that is of value. That's the best way to maintain a relationship, and if you know that you also want to be in touch with their children, at some point, ask if it's okay, to every once in a while reach out to their kids and share information you think might be of use to them as well. So follow-up, even when somebody is a client is really the best way to maintain that relationship and build it.

Suzanne Carawan 29:06 

So I like what you're saying. Because you're saying just flat out, ask them just flat out ask them upfront how we prefer what they prefer, who they can get that permission from them. I like that because I do find that sometimes it becomes too, a little too cookie-cutter and too routine. And then it can kind of come off as not very authentic, right? Or if you're somebody like that, you don't want to come off as cheesy, you know, and it can, it can come off as cheesy, right? So you're trying to because I think what you're saying is you're trying to make that one-to-one with the client that fits what the client wants and how the client wants to be communicated to. So if you're like just an abusive person and you just love to flush all this out and maybe that's too much for your client, but also maybe just naturally you'll find the people that you fit with too. I do think there is some piece to that or just finding your right size fit people. And I guess I'd asked the other question, which is, I think one of the hardest things we hear is, we know it's a numbers game. But having said that, every member wants to keep every client, right. You don't want to lose any. But let's talk about when people do need to leave and break those relationships, or it's just not the right relationship, right? And what does that look like, so any thoughts there for, for knowing that, especially when you're getting going to say, it's just not going to be a great fit? Maybe we're swimming upstream.

Lynne Franklin 30:31 

It's funny, because that reminds me of a story. I was talking with a physician, who is no longer a practicing doctor, he was now a consultant to other doctors on how to build their practices, and the reading a phone conversation and about 10 minutes into it. I said, I'm really not the right person for you. Let me refer you to somebody else, I think is a better fit. And he said, what do you mean? And I said, Well, usually when I spent this much time with somebody realized, I know whether or not I'm good fit. And whatever it is, that makes that happen. I'm not feeling it here. So I will be doing you a disservice if we work together. So let me send you to somebody else that I think will be better for you. And honest to goodness, for the next 15 minutes, this doctor is trying to convince me that we really need to work...

Suzanne Carawan 31:14 

I was gonna say, he's like, what are you talking about? I'm an overachiever, why don't you?

Lynne Franklin 31:18 

And so part of it was, I ultimately ended up saying to him, No, this is not a scarcity ploy. This is not me, say, pulling back so that you want me more this is I have made decisions like this before, when I felt things really weren't right. And then they ended up badly, or the other person or for me, or for both of us. And I want to save both of us that angst, this is a better fit for you, I promise. And so part of that becomes his new as of, insurance and financial advisors, you know where do you fit well, and it's easy for you, you wouldn't be in this business, if you didn't know these things, and had that gut reaction of this is a good fit, or this is not a good fit all things what they are, and you're there as an advocate. And sometimes the advocacy that you have is, we would be a great team to work together to reach the goals that you shared, let's do this. And sometimes the advocacy is, we've gone as far as I can take you. And now I see you have a need in this area. And that's not my strong suit. So what I want is your permission to connect you with somebody I think is a better fit in this area. Because when we started to work together, I promised you, I would always have your best interests at heart. And in this instance, I'm not your best interest, this other person is. So if I have your permission, I'd like to make that referral. And people will think you're wonderful, because you are you're putting their interests ahead of yours. And that doesn't happen everywhere.

Suzanne Carawan 32:59 

That's true, and what a grand, that's just great language you just used to be able to open up because in our space we do. We want our members, one of the best parts of NAIFA is you can build out your entire kind of practice team, if you will, for people that have specialties and be able to do that cross-referral and hand them into these specific pieces. And what a great way to be able to do that. And then actually your trust factor, monumentally increases, because you're not trying to be the one-stop, general practitioner of all you're trying to actually get them to the specialists that they need. And probably a good method to with a multigenerational piece, you know, could be like, your father trusted me, but I think for you, that might be a great way to do some split cases, etc. to help them identify what's going to be the good fit, because that can get a little dicey as well. So yes, I mean, those are great, great pieces. Okay, so now let's talk about I want to switch gears a little bit. And I want to talk about what we like to focus in on all the time, which is just getting better every day. Like, Chris Gandy will tell you if he's here 1% more 1% better each and every day, right? It's gonna get us to be the top of our game. So what are kind of some three things that advisors right now just listening to this can just up their game today by some tips you want to give them?

Lynne Franklin 34:22 

Okay, and I've got two and the first year I'll take two. Yeah, every week, try something. So decide, because here's the thing, there are so many things you can do. Chris talked about yeah, the 1%. From a brain standpoint, pick one thing. And my overachievers know you can have two or three, one thing, okay. So this week, I'm going to try paraphrasing. And when I'm talking with a client when I'm talking with people at hell to try paraphrasing and see what kinds of responses I get and make them and number one, make sure that I'm using the same language that that person is using. And then once you decide that one thing that you're going to do this week, second thing, get yourself an accountability partner, tell somebody, this is what I'm practicing this week, then what I would love to have you do is hold me accountable next week, let's have a five-minute conversation. And I'll tell you what I learned by doing that stuff this week. Because we make promises to ourselves all the time, and we're full of crap. And inertia is the most powerful force in the universe, we automatically go back to doing the same things that we've always done, because that feels comfortable for us. And so when I say to you, I'm going to practice paraphrasing this week, and I want to talk to you next Tuesday, and let you know, for five minutes to let you know what I discovered and what I've learned. Yeah, it may be Sunday night, when I realized, geez, I hadn't really done much paraphrasing, then Monday, I'm going to focus on it, knowing that somebody else is going to have you accountable that you have to report back, it's financially increases the chances that you will do something, and you will learn something, and you'll make your practice better.

Suzanne Carawan 36:17 

So, I hadn't thought about that. But that is actually a hidden benefit of NAIFA membership. Because I feel very confident that if you're a member, you could pick up the phone in our huge network and say, I need an accountability partner, and somebody would say, okay, I'm here for you. Right. And that works really, really well. I want to ask you about a little bit about your team training, because we do have so many members and potential members out there who are either head of their agency or running their firm or building a firm and working on the team dynamics. So when you come in to coach, talk to us about what do you normally looking to do? Like, what are the top I guess, let me ask this, what are the top challenges that you get asked to come in to help with in that team environment, when you're working with a firm or agency?

Lynne Franklin 37:04 

It's usually and it won't surprise you is a communication issue. And a lot of times, because people are in the middle of it, they cannot see it. So I'll tell you a quick story about how I was brought in by the head of loan syndication in a bank. And he said to me, I want you to do a training for my people on how they need to follow processes and procedures. And I thought I wanted to show up with that guy. And I said, okay, so how about I interview your people and find out what they really need. So I did 10-minute phone interviews with all of the people in the department. And I discovered no, they follow processes and procedures, and they're detail and deadline-driven. But they deal with people who are relationship managers in the bank. So the people or the relationships with the companies that need to be in the loan syndication, where they will purchase it once it's done. And because these people are relationship managers, and actually because the people that loan syndication were deadline in detail driven, they would say to the people, the relationship managers, if we don't get this information by Friday, the deal will close. While relationship managers aren't driven by details, or deadlines, right, and so they've already talked to the client that they, they're not going to call them again, because they don't want to look like a fool. And so part of what then if you can, is you need to deal with people in the relationship, they're relationship managers deal with them like you have a relationship with Him. Because the other thing that we're doing is when they kind of get the information from them, they were finding a way to backdoor it, which means that they were training the relationship managers never to get back to them and give them information because they find it someplace else. And why should the relationship manager be bought? So we needed to break that cycle. And one of the strategies that we came up with was at the end of every loan syndication, go back to the relationship manager and say, I'm sure there are things we could have said or done, I could have said or done that would have made this a better process for you and your client. And I would really love to hear that stuff. Please tell me. And of course, they would get information. And they were data-driven. So they like that. And then the relationship manager is waiting for them to say, okay, so here's what you should have done for me. So I won't go out there, say thank you, I really appreciate your being honest with me. And the next time we do a deal together, I'll keep this stuff in line. And when the next deal came along. top of the relationship manager again and say, hey, these are the three things you told me that would make things better for you and your client. So here's what I'm gonna do about that stuff. And by the way, part of my job was to make you look like a Rockstar in front of your client. So if things come up during the course of this deal, or I can make that happen, just let me know. And I'll do my best. And suddenly their emails and their phone calls were getting returned and they were getting the information that they needed, because instead of dealing from their own deadline in detail-oriented perspective, they're dealing from a relationship perspective. So a lot of what I do with teams is we figure out what is it that you're trying to accomplish? And what's the best way to do it, and it usually comes from better understanding the people they're trying to reach, and then changing the way they communicate. It's that it's how that person likes to give information. And then they get what they need.

Suzanne Carawan 40:13 

So I mean, you're talking about the classic, front office, back office, kind of a piece that's prevalent in every financial services organization, I'd say every organization, every business, right, where you've got just the different propensities for how people deal with the information. But I think what's interesting, and I think it's bears all of us in mind is that there's our way that we personally do this. And then there's the what we need to do for the business or the good of the overall order. And these two, you have to step outside of yourself to do that. Right. So if I'm a looker, and then I'm dealing with listeners, or if I'm the listener, and I'm dealing, I need to take the opposite approach I liked that you brought up and method actor, I think that's brilliant, being able to take time to get in that other person's shoes. as uncomfortable as that might be right. But knowing that we need to do that. Any kind of examples, there are practice tips for how we can kind of apply that I think it's probably especially hard for the looker, since they dominate. They dominate the market. So tips for looker is to become better with the listeners and the other 5% there.

Lynne Franklin 41:22 

So I'll tell you another story there. I talked about lookers listeners and touchers and I had a president of a digital marketing firm come up to me afterwards and say, Now I get it. I've been interviewing for a job. And this fellow was sitting across me, didn't give me any eye contact throughout the entire interview. And I thought he was just blowing me off. And but every time I asked him a question, he knew the answer and gave it to me. And now I'd get this person is a listener for me lots of eye contact. And I said, great insight. Now, what's the job you're hiring this person for? And he's like, how's it to calibrate, I said, know that most of your clients are going to be lookers. And then your touch are some less 80% of people value eye contact. If this person doesn't automatically give people eye contact, the relationships there will not flourish. So do you believe that this person can be traded? Obviously, the person has the knowledge do believe that person can be trained to give people more eye contact and build relationships that way? And if that So, and this could be a great person for you to hire, and if not wrong first. So know your capabilities know the capabilities of the people around you and put the right people in the right slot?

Suzanne Carawan 42:40 

Yeah, I mean, what a great tip, because maybe juice was not worth the squeeze in that standpoint, just go for the people that I love that that's a great one, especially in the higher recruiting side of it, which is such a big part of our industry is being able to bring more people in, like, the right people. And of course, yeah, and when you give me thought too, is that I do think that, we need more people to come into financial services, right. And I think actually coming from this viewpoint that you're saying is like, one do you like people, right? The passion you talked about, there's some different ways we can I think accomplish that. But I think that's a really I love that you have to sit, you're thinking about from the hiring viewpoint, getting that right person into the slot with the group of people with the population that you're trying to target. That makes a ton of sense. Okay, well, Lynne, we're coming up on at what we like to call our lightning round. But before we do that, do you have anything you want to say about what people will experience when we get to apex east in just under what, two weeks or so a little over two weeks, I guess?

Lynne Franklin 43:49 

Well, what are the things we're doing in advance is we're doing a survey. So we're asking a couple of questions, which will then allow me to tailor this session for that particular problem that everybody who's coming to this session experiences? So here's the beauty of it. We've been talking in generalities. And I hope you picked up a tip here and there. We're going to laser focus on a particular situation that everybody who comes to this faces, and how can we use communication to break through that stuff? Understanding how people's brains work, understanding what to say or do to make that connection with people so that ultimately, we're not telling people what to do, or getting them to do what they should do.

Suzanne Carawan 44:33 

Oh, excellent. Yes. A little persuasion there. Okay. Well, so if you haven't gotten your seat yet, you can do so by going to apex.naifa.org, we're actually down lenok and if it is gonna be the numbers, we're kind of running out of slots. So get your space there again, it is October 24. One-day event at our new national headquarters in Roslyn, which is Arlington, Virginia. So we're excited to see you and be there in person and then looking into 2024 as well about how Lynne Franklin is gonna pair up with NAIFA and do more good work. So with that Lynne, we want to get to the lightning round. There's no wrong answers. It's just questions that get to know you a little bit more, and get some extra value out of you. So first easy one favorite food.

Lynne Franklin 45:19 

Favorite food. I live in Chicago, it's gonna be pizza.

Suzanne Carawan 45:23 

Oh, you know then Chris Gandy is gonna say what as a deep dish like what's your favorite one where in the city is your favorite?

Lynne Franklin 45:30 

Okay, so deep dish, Lu Mel noddy's, Lu Mel noddy's or Nancy's.

Suzanne Carawan 45:36 

Oh Nancy's. Oh, that's a good one too. I forgot the Nancy's. All right, next question then, favorite sports team?

Lynne Franklin 45:43 

Favorite sports team? Okay, well, I grew up in Minnesota. And so for the longest time it was the Vikings. But yes, I moved to Chicago long enough ago, it's the bulls.

Suzanne Carawan 45:57 

Gonna be on the bulls. So we're gonna have to connect you with Corey Anderson. So big shout out. Shout out there to Corey Anderson. He's a major Vikings fan. We'll be happy that you said that first. All right, next one. What do you listen to for a podcast? Or what do you listen to regularly?

Lynne Franklin 46:15 

And I have to admit, I am an audiobook person. Because traffic in Chicago is not a fun place to be. So in order to prevent myself from getting fogged off, while the people who are doing stupid things in front of me, I put audiobooks on. And so I listen to that stuff, brings my blood pressure down and gets me to focus on other things. auditorily because I'm a listener, I can get audiobooks, but I can still see what's going on around me. And then I can smile, rather than get angry at people.

Suzanne Carawan 46:48 

So is there a top when you listen to lately that you are like what kind of do you listen to like more informative stuff? Are you listening to novels? What do you listen to?

Lynne Franklin 46:56 

Well, I listened to novels, because, there was one point where I was listening to the audiobook for something called Sapiens, which is the history of us as Homo sapiens. And I realized, like, it was giving me lots of data, and I was missing it, because I needed to pay attention to who was turning left in front of me. And so when I do, I call them top one for the buying the books, so that, where there's character development, and, you know, mysteries, a lot of times or historical stuff, and things that engage my brain so that I'm not focused on the fact that I'm sitting in traffic, and it's going nowhere. And I need things that do not frustrate me or make me anxious when I can get both of those in traffic anyway.

Suzanne Carawan 47:42 

True, good point. All right, and then, you know, if you could go back in time and have dinner with anybody who's either living or was living at some point, who would that be?

Lynne Franklin 47:53 

Eleanor Roosevelt. Yeah, she was a woman who was brought up in a very sheltered environment, and then suddenly found herself on the world stage, and then found herself without her husband, and continued to make a difference in the lives of people and around the world. And so that kind of global perspective, that one person can make a difference, and influence lots of other people in a positive way. I'd love to pick her brain.

Suzanne Carawan 48:26 

So my actual favorite quote is so funny, she said, is Eleanor Roosevelt, who said, most people tiptoe softly through life to arrive safely at death, then little that's true. So, maybe live a little bit more out loud, I think is what she was trying to say. And she certainly did that. What about your favorite quote?

Lynne Franklin 48:48 

See, now I'm in Chicago. So I actually I've got two. First one is Chicago, Al Capone, you can get a lot farther with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone. And because I'm actually related to Ben Franklin, one of my favorite Ben Franklin is an empty bag cannot stand upright.

Suzanne Carawan 49:12 

All very true. Well, thank you so much, Lynne, for joining us. We can't wait to see you on October 24 at Apex, and we're glad that you're now part of the NAIFA family. So thanks, everybody. We look forward to seeing you on our next Advisor Today podcast. Take care.

Outro 49:29 

Thanks for joining us for NAIFA's Advisor Today podcast series. Make sure to subscribe to get future episodes. And if you're interested in coming on the show, let us know.